Accessories Bicycles Parts Specials Tools

Search and

Bicycle Humor
Sheldon Brown photo
by Sheldon Brown and others

Spoke Divider

green paint logo Magic Paint April 1, 2015

A pavement marking paint that does double duty as an illuminated warning signal!

5and5 logo Dent Removal April 1, 2014

Remove those pesky dents in a flash!

sonics logo ShelBroCo Sonics™ April 1, 2013

Meet the US National Highway Traffic Safety Administration standards with distinctive sounds.

American flag SCB American Way
April 1, 2012

Now you can OWN the urban bicycle of your dreams.

new gifimage April 1, 2011

all the advantages of the classic ten-speed and of a modern ten-sprocket system

Sheldon's Secret Cellar

April 1, 2010

YOUR turn to turn the wrench

Bike Walk America

April 1, 2009

Bicycling advocacy takes a walk

ShelBroCo Chain Cleaning System April 1, 2007
There is Only One Correct Way to clean and lubricate your chain!
FasterCard Titanium April 1, 2005
The credit card for the Serious Cyclist!
Nanodrive April 1, 2004
The drivetrain of the 21st century!
Product W April 1, 2003
Product W, the ultimate performance-enhancing drug, with Theobromine!
Bikecentennial Airbag Helmet January 19, 2003
Safety With Style
image April 1, 2002
It's probably too late for you--but don't you want your children to have a chance to become Champion Cyclists?
TORK-GRIP Universal Torque Wrench April 1, 2001
Are you a Real Man? Then why are you still riding on a "unisex" saddle?
Real MAN Bicycle Saddles April 1, 2000
Are you a Real Man? Then why are you still riding on a "unisex" saddle?
A revolutionary new spoke design makes spoke breakage a thing of the past!
Goofy Bicycle Gimmicks & Gadgets From the laboratory to you
Can't figure out your gears? Maybe you need a GearTel!
Sheldon Brown's Geomagnetic Booster ® Cutting Edge Technology
Use the Earth's magnetic field to enhance your speed!
Evil Bicycles The Satanic Conspiracy Exposed!
Sinister corporations are trying to undermine the character of the Youth of America
by producing bicycles which glorify Evil!
Postings by
Carapace Completed Umber
Humor from the rec.bicycles.* newsgroups.

Although I am well known to have no sense of humor whatever, my alter ego, Carapace Completed Umber, is silly enough for both of us. This page collects some of his postings to various bicycle-related newsgroups.
POWerwheels Humiliate Your Friends!
Are your spokes holding you back? Then you need new POWerwheels!
Bikes vs.Blades [by A Cyclist]
Vehicle or vestment? 101 Reasons Why Biking is Better than Blading
Superleggero Bearing Balls Save weight! Go Fast!
Are you still using old-fashioned solid bearing balls? No wonder you're so slow!.
Bayonetz ® The Ultimate Bar Endz!
Sheldon Brown's Miscellaneous Humor Collection Gathered from here and there
Not bicycle related, but funny.
BikeReader Humo(u)r A humo(u)r compendium
From That Sceptred Isle
The Rarest of the Rare Classic parts from Cycles de Oro
Mountainbike Militiamen
Watch out for the Black Helicopters!
Be ready to ride the apocalypse!
Mountain-Bike Ragazine Rad, dude!
Mountain-bike connection with Indian music, alas.
Ken Kifer's Cycling and
Touring Humor
Some of this is related to the rec.bicycles newsgroups.
Spike Bike Don't get mad, get even!

For bloodthirsty cyclists.

Spoke Divider

Sheldon Brown's General Humor Page


Spoke Divider


Audacious! by Tom Shaddox A classic Moulton takes on
A fifteen chapter fictional short story written for the subscribers of the Moulton list
Tandem Fiction by Tom Shaddox Tandem Whimsy
Short fiction and satire by Tom Shaddox, from the The Tandem@Hobbes email list email list.
Fiction by Tim McNamara Cycling on the Northern Frontier.
Road and Track cycling among the Caribou in Minnesota.
Some of these stories were previously on the late, lamented, FixedGearFever site.

Spoke Divider

Articles by Sheldon Brown and others
Beginners Brakes Commuting
Fixed Gear
Frames Gears &
Tandems Touring What's
Wheels Sheldon

Accessories Bicycles Parts Specials Tools

Sheldon Brown's Hotlists

Copyright © 1995, 2008 Sheldon Brown

Harris Cyclery Home Page

If you would like to make a link or bookmark to this page, the URL is:
Last Updated: by Harriet Fell